The deer deeply gazes at the clear pond. As it drinks the water gleefully, an unsuspecting bullet clears the air straight into the heart of the deer. "What a shot!" exclaims Charlie. "Just like father taught us" reminds Robert. The boys have a celebratory high-five and proceed to bag the deer up. "I can't wait to see the look on Sarah's face when she sees this beauty." remarks Charlie. They venture back home through the same path they take. Each of the boys understands the many twists and turns as familiarly as the back of their own hands. As they approach the village, something seems amiss. The smell of smoke fills the surrounding air. The boys drop everything they are carrying and rush to their home. They find their mother sobbing at the doorstep. The only coherent words from her mouth being, "They took Sarah". The boys think intensely as to "who took a Sarah" and "where did they go". They decide to run to the port south of their home. Along the way, they find their father deeply wounded. Robert frantically pulls out the first-aid kit in their bag in order to care for his father. The boys' father begins to breathe and speaks. "Pirates came to the village and ransacked everything. They murdered countless of our friends and family and took Sarah away from us. I ran to confront them after Sarah was taken, but they were too strong. You must hurry. They have already left the port but you can still catch up to them and save her." The boys' father slowly closes his eyes and breathes his last breath. Charlie begins to sob but Robert holds his tears back with much difficulty. Robert consoles his brother, "Save your thoughts for father later. We don't have much time to catch up to the pirates". Both of the boys run to the port to find a pirate ship. They inspect the ship but nonetheless, there is nothing and nobody aboard the ship. Charlie looks at the helm of the ship and notices that wheel is detached from the boat. Charlie yells to Robert that the ship is not able to be sailed. Robert remembers the Charlie as a child being so fascinated with ships and remembers the peace that his family had. "Perhaps there's another ship that we can use." suggests Charlie, but Robert reminds him that this was the only ship at the port. As the brothers stare desperately at the sky, a voice echoes behind them. An old man appears and tells them, "The pirates that you seek reside at Treasure Island 45 kilometers east of here". Still despondent, Charlie whispers, "Even if we know where they're at, this ship is in no condition to be able to set sail". "Do not worry" says the old man, and suddenly the ship begins to move forward. "I can steer this ship", claims the man. Ecstatic, the boys have a celebratory high-five and questions the old man, "who are you?" The old man tells them, "I am the spirit of this ship. My journey will be ending soon, and my last act must be helping to stop the pirates." The boys see the coast of Treasure Island and thank the man for taking them there. The old man pleads with the boys, "When we land, my last request is for you to set this ship to fire. When the ship is burned down, I will be free from being the spirit of a wicked pirate ship." As the ship docks at the port of Treasure Island, the boys light the ship on fire with a burning blaze and glory as the old man disappears from the ship with a smile. As the boys leave the dock of the island, tears run down from the side of Robert's cheek. Charlie reminds him, "We still have a job to do", and the boys continue in their search for their sister.
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The inspiration for the old man, Klabutermann,
sharing parallels with Kabandha |
Author's Note:
I loosely based this story on a few of the stories from the Ramayana. Originally, Ravana and Maricha plan to kidnap Sita, Rama's wife, from Rama. Maricha lures away Rama by shift shaping into a golden deer. As Maricha gets shot by Rama with an arrow, he alarts Rama's brother by imitating Rama's voice, leaving Sita alone. Then Ravana comes and steals away Sita. Rama and his brother go to find Jatayu who battled against Ravana in an attempt to get Sita back. Then they find a demon who tells them where Ravana went and they cremate him in order to free him from being an evil demon. My story and the story in the Ramayana have some plot similarities between them. My inspiration for the spirit for the ship comes from the Klabautermann, which is a Germanic myth where the ship has a spirit that sometimes protects sailors and comes out when the ship is doomed. The rakshasa, Kabandha, made me think of a spirit because it wanted to be free from being an evil rakshasa. So I thought about a spirit that served wicked purposes without wanting to. Similary to Kabandha, the spirit of the pirate ship served an evil purpose but wanted to be free from it.
Bibliography:
Indian Myth and Legend by Donald A. Mackenzie (1913)
Hey Nathan!
ReplyDeleteReally cool idea for a story. Definitely very different than the story from the Ramayana, but well done! I liked the addition of the spirit of the pirate ship. Being forced to serve evil unwillingly gave that character a really compelling story. One comment though is that this story was a bit difficult to read since it was all one paragraph. Be sure to make separate paragraphs so your stories are more pleasant to read but otherwise good job!
Hi Nathan!
ReplyDeleteAwesome story. I think you did a great job at the author's note. You provided a lot of great detail to show how you created your story. I love how you did not just retell the story, but used other myths too. It created a more interesting story! If I had to suggest something, it would be to just break up the story into paragraphs. This will help it become more readable! Overall, great job!